


I’m Gonna Spend My Life (Have Mercy)

by elysiumwaits



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: 80's Music, Billy Idol lyrics, M/M, Making Up, No Dialogue, Songfic, this is a songfic what year is it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:40:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21612388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elysiumwaits/pseuds/elysiumwaits
Summary: Billy doesn’t apologize with words, but Steve understands him anyway.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Comments: 6
Kudos: 95





	I’m Gonna Spend My Life (Have Mercy)

**Author's Note:**

> This was a tag challenge on Tumblr, and is not at all what I’m supposed to be writing right now. Also, Whiplash Smile isn’t available on Apple Music, which is a goddamn crime, but is available for like $5 as a cassette and I have a great entertainment center, so I’ll take what I can get. It is also available on Spotify, though! And “To Be a Lover” is on the greatest hits compilations on a variety of platforms.
> 
> Title from Billy Idol’s version of “To Be a Lover.”

Billy doesn’t apologize with words often.

Well, okay, amendment to that statement: Billy doesn’t apologize with words and  _ mean it  _ often. Steve can count on one hand the number of times that Billy has said the words “I’m sorry,” and they were all shit-meet-fan moments. Once while Steve was bleeding out thanks to a monster, once while  _ Billy _ was bleeding out thanks to a monster, once following a mutual gay crisis they had before they got their shit together, and once when Billy had accidentally clocked Steve in the face with the cabinet door because he hadn’t known Steve was there (which was shit-meets-fan in its own way, considering how Billy had paled when Steve had sat down on the kitchen floor hard, covering his nose). The other times that Billy has actually verbally apologized have been laced with sarcasm, and they don’t count.

So what usually happens is this: Billy and Steve will get on each other’s nerves every so often. Maybe it’s a mix of work stress, family stress, life stress, or something. Maybe it’s the piles of baggage they have between them coming to a head. Maybe it’s something as stupid as drinking directly from the carton, maybe it’s something important like Steve’s father making little jabs about Billy at dinner so that it all just erupts into a passive-aggressive pissing contest.

And sometimes, Steve doesn’t even know what sets it off. He just knows that he and Billy are, like, opposites attract in all the ways that don’t matter and similar in all the ways that do. So occasionally, they’ll have a good old-fashioned argument about  _ absolutely nothing _ , because they just so happen to be annoyed by the other’s existence that day. 

Which is ridiculous because, like, Steve misses Billy when they fight, even if he was annoyed by Billy an hour earlier. It’s worse when he has to go to work after one of their little “marital tiffs,” as Robin so helpfully calls them, because then he gets to sit there and be cranky and anxious for  _ no good reason _ for around eight hours. 

And maybe he’s a little annoyed still when he finally gets to go home. Maybe there’s a part of him that’s always a little worried that  _ this _ will be the stupid, silly thing that blows this whole relationship up in their faces. Maybe he’s scared that he’ll go home to find an empty house and a note, all of Billy’s records and posters and clothes and books just gone.

(It hasn’t happened like that, of course. Billy knows about that particular fear and even when they fight for  _ days _ , he’ll make sure to leave a note or something on the fridge or bathroom mirror with “still fucking mad at you but I love you, I’ll be back around 10” or something.)

Most of the time, though, when they fight and finally getting around to making up, Steve gets off work and comes home to Billy trying his best to make it clear that he’s sorry. Because Steve? Steve will apologize, he’ll say the words. But Billy either can’t or won’t, so he apologizes in the only way he really can - with music.

Tonight, Steve gets in the door and kicks off his shoes to Billy Idol’s  _ Whiplash Smile _ . As he closes the door and throws the lock, he hears the music stop suddenly in the middle of “Fatal Charm.” A second later, the needle drops again, and Steve can’t help the smile tugging at his lips at the opening music. 

“ _ Have I told you lately that I love you? _ ”

Steve feels hands slide from his shoulders to his waist, no hesitation, and lips press to the curls at the base of his neck. They alternate between kisses and mouthing along with the song against Steve’s skin. 

“ _ If I didn’t, darlin’, you see, I’m so sorry.” _

The trick to Billy’s apologies is that Steve doesn’t accept them right away. He makes sure to replace the little smile with a scowl, even as he lets Billy turn him around and tug him away from the front door, down the hall to the living room. He very carefully doesn’t grin when Billy falls back onto the couch and drags Steve down so that Steve’s straddling him, doesn’t laugh even though Billy’s fingers tickle when Billy gets his hands under Steve’s shirt to skate along his stomach to his back. 

“ _ Didn’t I reach out and hold you in these lovin’ arms?” _

Billy’s arms come around him to drag Steve even closer, hand coming up to tangle in his hair. Steve turns his face just enough to dodge the kiss Billy tries to pull him into, so that Billy’s lips land on the corner of his mouth instead. At this point, the fact that Steve hasn’t pushed himself off of Billy is proof that he’s just being petulant, drawing it out as much as he wants, to milk it. He is who he is, and the glorious thing now is that Billy wants him, spoiled brattitude and all. 

“ _ If I didn’t, baby… I’m so sorry _ .”

Steve will loosen up, give in as the song goes on. By the time the record moves to “Soul Standing By,” he’ll be letting Billy pull him into a long, affirming make-out that will last through that song, and possibly clear through the chorus of “Man for All Seasons.” 

The music will more than likely fade into silence long before they do, but Steve will check out of the record around the time this song ends. Even as Billy Idol sings about coming in from the storm and souls on fire, his Billy will be singing this one into Steve’s skin, and Steve will hear the words in his mind as he does.

“ _ Gonna spend my life makin’ love to you _ .”


End file.
